Someone walks up to you and says “I will give you a cookie if you look up that girl’s skirt”.
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I believe pointing frustration at these people is a fruitless and quite embarrassing position to take. Read more

I look forward to the article where someone finds one of these assholes and beats the shit out of him personally. Read more

BREAKING NEWS! Convicted serial murderer not happy with public image! More at 11! Read more

Regan also claimed that he personally, and the scalper group as a whole, regularly donate to charity, including giving most of their monthly membership fees to a local food bank. Read more

I look forward to the follow-up article in two years where supply has caught up with demand and these assholes are are forced to sell large amounts of their remaining stock at a loss. Read more

TIE Fighter is #1 on the list, this means that the list is correct and no further rankings are needed. Read more

F Read more

F Read more

F Read more

F to call a herb a herb. Read more

Press F to get hit by a car Read more

F Read more

Press F to Deadspin Forever. Read more

Since this is Max “what broken nose” Scherzer - “back spasms” must mean literal scarab beetles crawling around under his skin and chewing on his muscles and tendons, a la 1999's The Mummy.  Read more

We’re gonna need you to show your work on those top 24 guys. 
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Buddy, of course I am not suggesting that. I’m just laughing at him posing as though that’s something he would consider doing, in the aftermath of this humiliating result. The honest thing would be to say “We desperately need those guys, as everyone who watch the 2019 FIBA World Cup can see.” Read more

HE HATE TEAMS Read more

At the end Gary has to die Read more

OK, I’ll be that guy—is the positive reception Ray Ratto’s articles have gained around here mystifying to anyone else or is it just me? Read more