Nobody In Louisiana Wants to Vote for Former KKK Wizard and Felon David Duke, For Some Reason

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In the midst of this particularly terrifying election season, sometimes it’s nice to remind ourselves of the small, good things in life. The air is fresh, the last golden days of summer haven’t quite slipped by, and nobody at all wants to vote for avowed racist and repugnant old weirdo David Duke. We haven’t completely lost it, America!

David Duke is a former “grand wizard” in the KKK, with all the charm that entails. From his campaign website, specifically the portion that pledges he’ll stand against the “ethnic cleansing of America:”

The media celebrates the “dying out of white people in America and the replacement of our nation’s population with a majority of people of non-European descent who will embrace radically different ideologies than the founding principles of America.

We all know that this is true.

We know our heritage and freedom and values …and all that we love and care about is under attack in our nation.

It is time to stand up!

You get the idea.

Duke served one term in the Louisiana legislature a long time ago, and has since run unsuccessfully for all sorts of things, including governor of the state, the state Senate, the House and Senate, and even the presidency (he ran as a Democrat in 1988 and a Republican in 1992). The unifying factor in all these elections is that hardly anyone wanted to vote for him.

Duke had a relatively long absence from the public eye, one he presumably spent sleeping in a crypt somewhere, emerging only to net himself a felony conviction on tax fraud charges. But he returned aboveground in late July to announce he planned to run for Senate. Naturally, he was inspired by Donald Trump, saying in a campaign announcement that he’s “overjoyed to see Donald Trump and most Americans embrace most of the issues that I’ve championed for years.”

Duke said in his campaign announcement that he has “overwhelming support,” which is about as true as anything else he routinely has to say. As WDSU reports, a new poll found that basically no one in the state of Louisiana has time to vote for an aging racist. The pollsters found that Duke is “extremely unpopular” with about 82% of registered voters they surveyed, regardless of race, gender, or party affiliation.

Duke is undaunted, employing some creative math to assure his tens of fans that actually, he’s winning.

Duke is running against 23 other people. Literally any of them is better qualified than him. Just pick one. You can read the full poll here.