Man Emerges From Sewer Grate to Lob Smoke Bomb at NY Restaurant

Absolutely nothing in that headline is remotely embellished in any way.

Early Friday evening, a man wearing an American flag t-shirt emerged from a sewer grate in front of Manhattan's Bar Pitti, lobbed a smoke bomb into the restaurant's outdoor patio, then flew back underground like the WTF Fairy. There's actually a video of this happening, and believe me, it doesn't get less confusing when you see it.

Actress Rose McGowan was also eating at the restaurant, which is great, because as we all know, a thing didn't happen unless a celebrity saw it firsthand. Her tweet from the scene of the crime against sanity:

No one was harmed, as a restaurant employee was able to grab the smoke bomb and throw it clear of the patio. Still, as far as I can see, this story means two things: 1) we did something to piss Rat King off, and 2) (considering the t-shirt) he's feeling especially patriotic lately.

Image via jurgenfr/Shutterstock.