Let Michele Bachmann Tell You Why She's Not Seeking Reelection

Here's Michele Bachmann being pretty damn vague about why she's leaving Congress. Did you shudder when she called you her "good friend," or was that just me?

Given recent events — claimed Obamacare would "literally" kill women, continued to evade claims she violated Senate ethics rules, much, much more — that don't, of course, stand out from the rest of the unbearable, confusing hangover that is her political career — we don't really need to know more. Bye! Please go into reality TV next. Bravo needs you.