Jeff Sessions Is Coming For the Leakers

Congratulations to the very hard-working Donald Trump for taking his second vacation in his few months as president!

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • The Department of Justice will triple the number of leak investigations, hoping to end the the constant flood of information revealing Trump’s gross incompetence each week. [The New York Times]
  • New York Governor Anthony Cuomo may face primary competition from Cynthia Nixon, aka Miranda from Sex and the City [The Wall Street Journal]
  • New Hampshire is rightly pissed that the President called the state a “drug-infested den” in a phone conversation with Mexican president Enrique Peña Nieto that was leaked earlier this week [Associated Press]
  • On that note, Trump’s calls with Nieto and Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull have turned us into (even more of) a laughingstock around the world [McClatchy DC]
  • The Senate unanimously voted to take a recess every three business days through Labor Day, blocking Trump from making recess appointments. [The Hill]
  • July’s job growth numbers are out, and they’re better than expected. So of course, Trump is taking credit. [New York Magazine]

Here are some tweets the President was allowed to publish:

This has been Barf Bag.