I never get tired of hearing news about “Cannibal Cop” Gilberto Valle. Never.
Today the New York Post satisfied my craving in a big way with a profile of 32-year-old Valle dishing about his dating life over “garden omelettes” at brunch. According to Valle, dating is fairly hot for him at the moment—50 women, give or take, want to have sex with him. Oh boy!
“Everything is already out there for people to see, so I have no problem answering questions honestly,” Valle said. “I like meeting women who already know everything about me, so I don’t have to suddenly drop this bomb on them.”
He does have a point, this guy is eminently Google-able. In March 2013, Valle was convicted of conspiring to kidnap, kill and eat several woman, one of them was his ex-wife. However, Valle was never sentenced and a judge eventually threw out his conviction in June 2014. He spent 21 months in jail, seven of them in solitary confinement.
What Valle is most well-known for is writing stuff like this to fellow flesh enthusiasts on Internet chat forums: “I was thinking of tying her body onto some kind of apparatus . . . cook her over a low heat, keep her alive as long as possible.”
Here’s the Post’s write-up, published Sunday, of a date Valle went on a month ago:
“After chatting for a while on Facebook, I took the initiative and asked her out,” he said. “Since she’s not from New York City originally, I showed her around and we did touristy stuff.”
The twentysomething Brooklyn gal and Valle whetted their appetites at a Chinese joint around Wall Street — he had the Grand Marnier shrimp and she ordered the eggplant.
A self-described “gentleman,” he buttered up his lady friend — whom he described as “passionate about law” — by whisking her to the top of the Empire State building. The romantic evening ended with a stop at Stand-Up New York for a comedy show.
This is not the first time that Valle has gone looking for love since his ex-wife left him (and tipped off the feds) in 2012. For instance, Valle reportedly created an OkCupid profile about a month later, in which he listed his favorite book as Green Eggs and Ham, writing of the Dr. Seuss classic, “I try to employ it in my everyday life.”
And just how does he do that? Maybe, just maybe we will learn about it in Valle’s forthcoming book, which he told the Post will be a “brutal tell-all” brimming with meaty details of his sexual proclivities. He’s already hired Brian Whitney, the guy who did porn star Porsche Lynn’s The Girl with the Million-Dollar Legs, to ghostwrite it. This is going to be spectacular.