Let's Get Critical: The Wows and the Weird at the Critics' Choice Awards

Let's Get Critical: The Wows and the Weird at the Critics' Choice Awards

Featuring a tale of two hotties: Kristen Stewart and the entire Yellowjackets cast.

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On Sunday night, the stars stepped out to wow us, dazzle us, and, in some cases, to make us gag in honor of the 27th Annual Critics Choice Awards.

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Held at the Fairmont Century Plaza in Los Angeles on Sunday, the Oscars’ cute little cousin aka the Critics Choice Awards are objectively less cringe and only slightly more socially relevant than the Golden Globes. Some notable moments included Jane Campion doing some wild shit during her acceptance speech for best director for the Netflix film The Power of the Dog, a western film I did not watch that also won best picture; Licorice Pizza received the award for best comedy, despite being widely criticized for anti-Asian racism and a questionable love story between a twenty-something woman and a fifteen-year-old boy.

On the television front, Succession won best drama series, which is good because Kieran Culkin simply looked too hot to not be a winner. Maria Bakalova, Billy Crystal, and others paid homage to Ukraine, Serena Williams poked fun at her sister Venus, and, yes, the rest of this round-up is essentially dedicated to how perfect Yellowjackets is.

Without further ado, here come some fashion icons, bi-cons, and flops.

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Hannah Einbinder

Hannah Einbinder

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Photo: Taylor Hill/FilmMagic (Getty Images)

Speaking of bi-cons, Hannah is our king, our god, and our sweet ingenue. The breakout star of HBO’s Hacks (and my personal Jewish hero) has been alternating between dresses and tuxes for awards shows this season and, in this go-around, she looked like a fuckboy — my highest praise.

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Liv Hewson

Liv Hewson

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

This gay wood nymph came to EAT. It’s giving Outlander and cannibalism-gone-chic all at once. Gay Twitter is rightfully losing its collective mind over what Liv might do to them with this pretty little cane.

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Jodie Turner-Smith

Jodie Turner-Smith

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Photo: Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic (Getty Images)

Look at her. LOOK AT HER. It’s regal, victorian, commanding!!! Jodie is not taking any questions at this time!!! You can bet your ass that this dress and updo next to the “SEE HER” carpet messaging is a statement. I’m listening carefully. Anything you say, Jodie. Please, anything.

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Jasmin Savoy Brown

Jasmin Savoy Brown

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

No notes. Absolutely none. Find me over yonder buried deep in a cemetery.

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Courtney Eaton

Courtney Eaton

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Photo: Taylor Hill/FilmMagic (Getty Images)

Alright fine, I will dig myself deeper into my grave, as I am now, somehow, further deceased. Do you think the Yellowjackets cast agreed in their group text to put the rest of us little nincompoops to shame with this level of fashun? By the time I’ve even noticed the choker, it’s too late. I’m in love with Lottie (or maybe just consumed by her mind control, but does it really matter?).

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Kaitlyn Dever

Kaitlyn Dever

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

The star of Hulu’s Dopesick looks elegant and grown-up, but I hate to break the news to her stylist that I wore this exact look to my junior prom and have photographic evidence. Please reach out for proper styling credit.

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Ansel Elgort

Ansel Elgort

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

Not the perv ‘stache...

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Lena Blau

Lena Blau

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Photo: Taylor Hill/FilmMagic (Getty Images)

Grimes is shaking, as she realizes this person broke into her closet and stole the dress from her maternity shoot with her second baby Y, which clearly took place on Mars.

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Hailie Sahar

Hailie Sahar

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

Is Sahar a hot dog or a pair of labia lips? Does it matter? Does anything?

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Jung Ho-yeon

Jung Ho-yeon

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Photo: Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic (Getty Images)

The Squid Games actor is serving Hollywood starlet, but after a Brazilian butt lift.

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Sofia Pernas and Justin Hartley

Sofia Pernas and Justin Hartley

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Photo: Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic (Getty Images)

Matching? MATCHING???? Go apologize to Chrishell, Justin, and let our eyes heal from this monstrosity.

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Sophie Nélisse

Sophie Nélisse

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

The last of our Yellowjackets odes goes to Soph, who looks ethereal as fuck as she pays homage to elves Galadriel and Legolas.

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Kristen Stewart

Kristen Stewart

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SHE’S PEAKING, MY GOD. Kristen Stewart just won this carpet showdown, no contest.

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Kristen Wiig

Kristen Wiig

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Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images (Getty Images)

Unrecognizable, Wiig appears to have been styled by some combination of Kat Von Dee and Evanescence. It’s not for me, but if a goth reprisal is upon us, will someone point me to the nearest Hot Topic?

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