Your last point is one of the reasons I personally hate housework so much, I could never do it “right” to my mother’s exacting standards. She still complains about why all of her kids are messy and no one can bring themselves to explain it to her. Read more

Nailed it!  Read more

I wish I knew. I consider myself to be relatively tough but I am a complete disaster around bugs!  Read more

Going to try this this weekend, thank you. I have an acre of heavily landscaped, multi-gardened land (I’m imagining this sounds nice to you, it is beautiful and it is my hell) that we purchased (along with the house I grew up in) from my parents. My mother never worked and my stepdad was in sales so he always worked… Read more

You’re a saint. Two sets of twins?!?! I bow in your presence. You sound like an awesome mom and your kids are lucky to have you. My husband also doesn’t fully understand the emotional and invisible labor I do and it’s hard. I’m an anxious person who craves affirmation and approval and not being recognized for that… Read more

NOPE.  Read more

That’s a GREAT idea. Generally everything goes up in flames when baby arrives but you’ll quickly reestablish a new normal (and then it will change again!)   Read more

This is actually one of the things we talk a lot about. I’m like the institutional memory of our lives/home/family. Women tend to take on a lot of that “hidden” work, like remembering to get gifts for “Teacher’s Appreciation Week” or for the random toddler friend’s birthday party or researching preschools or doctor’s… Read more

100% own that I live a privileged life, I won’t make any excuses or try to pander about that. I’m very lucky. Read more

Bless you and please tell me how to kill/manage/remove trumpet vines?! “We wanted the privacy!” they say. THEY ARE GROWING THROUGH MY DRIVEWAY! Read more

This is exactly what happens with us. It’s also why I scrub my kid’s shoes clean and make sure their hair is perfect before we go anywhere with my mother. It’s semi-compulsive and I don’t blame her for all of it, it’s shit she did that rubbed off on me. Read more

That might be some of it? She’s not much of a coddler but he is her only boy (and youngest of 4) so he gets more slack. She’s 76 and she’s very liberal but there are still some entrenched beliefs on who does what in the household.  Read more

Yup, we get along great, I’ve frequently been caught saying I prefer her to my own. She’s also a 76 year old woman with outdated thoughts on who is in charge of what in a household. I don’t think it’s that odd. Read more

Additional 10% back with Rakuten/eBates today (which everyone should be using anyway.) Read more

Additional 10% back with Rakuten/eBates today (which everyone should be using anyway.)

Exactly. It’s a bullshit relic of the past and it needs to stop. I told my husband from day one that if we are both working then we are equal in EVERY domestic chore (except killing bugs, he kills the bugs.) Both our parents consistently give him kudos for any level of domestic work/child-rearing and he IS wonderful… Read more

Yard work is the worst. My parent’s gifted us with a landscaping service for the year last year (I’d just had a baby and we bought their house so they knew how much work it required.) Doing it ourselves this year is already a disaster and you’re right about the consequences. My husband does the mowing but I do most of… Read more

“ How people view messiness and cleanliness is also gendered, with women penalized for not being clean.” Read more

This timeline is just the fucking worst.  Read more

Yeah, I had a “chill” wedding. Outdoors at my home, 10 minute ceremony w/ a JoP, lots of kids, games, relaxed food, pretty much nothing was fancy except my dress. It was still a fucking logistical and planning nightmare. There’s basically no way to organize a multi-hour event for 100 people that includes… Read more

Yup. I’d love this. My husband would make a sad face and say he wouldn’t like it but I know he would!  Read more