In my experience as an incredibly pasty person, via an amalgamation of pasty, Eastern European ancestors, I am 100% certain this is the result of some sort of self-tanning product and poorly matched make up. ANY self-tanning product turns me this color, professional or self-applied, cheap or expensive, I end up… Read more

Seriously. It may or may not be the most important but there is no question that it is the BEST meal.  Read more

Baby passport photos are a massive pain in the ass. I have about 12 2*2 rejects to prove it.  Read more

I imagine from a development perspective it’s not the biggest deal that baby missed out on some of the “normal” parts of gestation, lots of women are bed-ridden, don’t speak, etc. but outside of that, the practical questions (Where does the baby go? What do you tell them? Do you do DNA tests and try and find the… Read more

Right? Like what is feeling of obligation there? I can’t fathom that.  Read more

I really do enjoy the invisibility of being 37, slightly overweight and having a mom bod. I have been sexualized by men since before I was a even a teen (I started wearing a bra at 8 or 9 and have been a D+ cup since 12), I was thrilled to lose all of that. Read more

I have to admit, there’s a level of fascination with the physical aspect on top of my abject horror. I am also very curious about where that baby is now and how all of that works out. Read more

And they’re hideous. Read more

They’re Ferragamo.  Read more

I ate two clementines today. Four yesterday. That is too many but citrus is so good at this time of year. I don’t like socks.  Read more

“I’m not big into tea but here’s my treatise on the topic.” Read more

Yup. No lie there. The most offensive thing I’ve found, outside of the taste, is that tea often makes you MORE THIRSTY. What the fuck is that?  Read more

I actually looked into the “designer squash” and the company that grows them sounds pretty cool. Read more

This made me indescribably happy. My kids are almost three and almost one and I already worry about the day they won’t want to cuddle anymore. Cheers to grown adult children still sitting on mama’s lap!  Read more

I was just at Sweetgreen where they are selling a “designer squash” a little larger than a grapefruit for $5. This has peak white people written all over it. Read more

I asked my husband the other day if he thinks our son knows that there are TV shows for adults?! Read more

I am 100% here for Christmas being a 3 months long debacle but I understand why others are not and feel bad that it’s becoming the norm. You’re not a grinch! Read more

Does she age? Do her parents? Are you aware that’s Dawson (James van der Beek) voices the father? Read more

My mom sent my son this Paw Patrol Power Wheels ATV ride on toy and there are big stickers for every character and then the teeny tiniest Skye sticker you could ever imagine. I flipped out about it and even my two year old was like “Mommy, where Skye?” It’s infuriating.  Read more

I LOVE VAMPIRINA! Seriously, LOVE IT.  Read more