'Scary' Lucille Ball Statue Is Finally Replaced, But Is She Really Gone? (No)

There are few things more amusing than when art goes awry, a conclusion I have reached based on precisely two cases: 1) Ecce Mono and 2) Monster Lucy.

Lucille Ball was a notorious beauty, so you can imagine the surprise felt by the residents of Celeron, New York, when a statue dedicated to their most famous hometown heroine turned out to be a wild-eyed, poison-wielding demon beckoning you to come closer so she can wear your skin.

The long-hated statue yielded a number of incredible quotes from residents when it burst into the news cycle last year, including this one from the New York Daily News:

“It looks like a monster,” a Celoron man championing the cause told the Daily News. “It not only does not look like Lucy, it doesn’t look human. And at nighttime it’s even scarier.”

Celoron officials who “all agreed it was ugly” have been working to fix the statue since it was erected in 2009, the man said.

Now, at long last, the residents of Celeron have gotten their wish. On Saturday, the town unveiled a new, decidedly more human Lucy by sculptor Carolyn Palmer. (Scary Lucy’s sculptor, Dave Poulin, offered to redo the statue for free, but the town declined.)

Mayor Scott Schrecengost referred to Scary Lucy’s seven-year reign in the park as “quite a ride.” From the AP:

Schrecengost said that after the controversy over the earlier statue the town was “bombarded with all kinds of artists that would like to redo the statue.” He said Palmer was “the best sculptor we could have ended up with.”

Palmer thanked the “salt-of-the-earth” people of Celeron.

The crowd applauded as Palmer and Schrecengost unveiled the bronze statue, which shows Ball in a polka-dot dress.

Still, the story gets better. Scary Lucy will not be cast into the fires of Hell, as her destruction requires. Instead, she’ll be moved to another spot in the park, where she can continue to terrify adults and children and bugs and dirt for many years to come. New Lucy: I hope those pearls double as a weapon.